There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I'm sobbing to NWA
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
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