I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
