So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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