oh god the rape fog is back!
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
