dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Randomize
