And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
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