i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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