Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Michael Bay diarrhea
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
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