she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
