You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
my poor anus
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
