i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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