I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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