You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
