she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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