at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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