I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Randomize
