You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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