Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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