I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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