We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I understand Curling. That high.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
