he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
