Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Floor bacon is actually really good
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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