vagina is talking i cant
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
