This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Randomize
