North Korea, Best Korea!
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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