i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
i now understand why vodka
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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