does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
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