Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
