Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
operation harelip BJ is a go
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
If I had your ass I would rule the world
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
