if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Randomize
