my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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