It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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