did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
