So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
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