Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
