My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
