At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
You can't just leave with hair like that
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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