Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Randomize
