I'm sorry my penis didn't work
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Randomize
