i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
