I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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