my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
