Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize
