The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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