Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Randomize
