I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
