Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
BRING THE BAGELS
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
