So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize