It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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