NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
